Live by the code that you gotta move on

Yesterday night I saw this amazing woman perform on stage. It was one of those moments when time flew right by...one of those moments when you're in the first row and after hours and hours of standing in your feet your back starts to hurt, your legs feel like they're beginning to grow roots but it doesn't matter because up there on the stage is the person you've wanted all your life to see.
As you may know Anastacia holds a very important part in my life, she is one of the reasons I started to move on after my grandmothers death. The night before the concert I wrote her a letter, I hoped that I would get to give her that letter, but somehow I know that there was a little chance to do that, but it happened, it actually happened. When a guy from her crew passed before my eyes I told him to give her the letter because it's very important. After the show the guy came to me and he said that he gave it to her sister and she'll read it by the time she gets to the hotel, so you, stranger, whoever you are, THANK YOU. My dream came true...
Something else happened...something that I would never think that would happen it did...to me...During a song entitled "I belong To You" I showed her the peace sign...and she showed the same thing to me back she looked at me and continued singing..."I belong to you, you belong to me/Forever", during the me and you part she pointed her finger to her and to me...it was a magical moment...she has no idea that the person that wrote her the letter and the person with the the peace sign are one and the same..but....Man....it was...let's see how Jason Newsted said it in an interview in '99 when he came to play with Metallica in Romania: "A good song is one that make the listener feel that that song was written for him, that tells his story"...Dude, you were so damn right!

Yesterday it all ended, during "You'll Never Be Alone" I said "Goodbye" to my grandma, it is time to move on...and beside me there was the person who has been with me all along this time, the person who tolerates my moods, my crankiness, my headaches, the person who I admire the most, the one who I love and cherish, my best friend. I started moving on because of her and I said my goodbyes with her by my side during "You'll never be alone" --- on the song who helped me so much.

Thank you Doina and Anastacia...

Ps: The horrible voice you might hear on the recording it's my voice :D



Laugh...dream....smile...think...learn...fight...be happy....every day counts!

Colours that remind me of people

Thought about making a post about colors that remind me of people:

Black(I know it's not a color) and Blue/Yellow - Doina
Red - Bogdan
Orange - Mom
Brown - Grandma
Green - My former Headmaster


I'll get back to this post later on when I'll remember more people


Laugh...dream....smile...think...learn...fight...be happy....every day counts!

I miss you grandma

I sure would've loved if you could've been there for me...sharing with me the joy and happiness of my teens...the disappointments and decisions that I've made through out the years... I sure could've used your guidance....grandma's can't live with them,,,can't live without them.... I wanna share with you something that my best friend wrote for her grandpa...

Dear grandpa
by Doina aka The Outlaws' Song

Dear grandpa,

One day I went looking for you,

But everything around me

Seemed to keep your secret

Please, grandpa, share it with me and tell me:

Are you a cloud…,…or a leaf…,…or a mountain?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Dear grandpa,

One night I left my home to look for you,

But the dark outside rendered my way difficult.

And the trees' shade hid you so well that I couldn't find you

So, dear loved grandpa, please tell me:

Are you a wave…,…or a root…,…or a star?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Dear grandpa,

One summer I left my friends to look for you

But the burning sun blinded my eyes

It dried my skin and stifled me with its heat.

So, grandpa, I beg you please tell me this:

Are you a bug…,…or a flower…,… or a fly?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Dear grandpa,

One winter I left my family to look for you,

But the wind pushed me aside my way

And the coolness broke me to pieces

So, grandpa, have mercy and tell me:

Are you a rain drop…,… or a snow flake…,… or a thunder?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Dear grandpa,

When there was no place left to search,

I thought to look for you among the animals

But I didn't know where to look firstly:

In the boundless heights of the sky,

In the dangerous caches of the jungle,

Or in the mysterious depths of the sea.

So, I'd like you so much to tell me:

Are you an eagle… … or a tiger… … or a shark?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Dear grandpa,

One spring night found me thinking of you

And lost In memories, staring to the moon

I wondered:

Grandpa of my heart

Are you a timid ray… …or a tiny shadow… …or a tired ghost?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Dear grandpa,

Surprisingly, after many restless nights, I fell asleep

And when the old Sandman sent me to the land of dreams

I asked you more ardently than ever

Dear loved grandpa

Are you the echo of my voice… …or the sadness in my cries… …or the fear in my eyes?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

But, dear grandpa,

When I woke up I realized that you're the angel on my shoulder

For you're my dearest memory

And no matter what else you may be

You will always be beside me.

There's no need to go that far looking for you

Because you are in here, deep down inside my heart.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I wanted to post this video because it helped me very much after my grandma passed away....this is a promise that I'm making to myself: I will meet Anastacia and tell her that her music is brilliant and that she helped me very much even if she doesn't realize it and even if definitely she heard this a thousand times...


Anastacia - You'll Never Be Alone (Official Music Video) - The best video clips are here


PS: Grandma....where ever you are...I love you...and I missed you...Oh yeah...and I found my piano professor just like you told me:)







Laugh...dream....smile...think...learn...fight...be happy....every day counts!

If only

There comes a time in a persons life when his neurons start to deteriorate and starts to forget. Normally this happens after middle age, apparently to me it happened sooner. A couple of days ago I received an email from my best friend telling me that she found a poem of mine in one of her emails and thought I might enjoy it. Now imagine that I read the certain email at 6 AM, so I thought that it was a joke....well it wasn't lol....I started to forget badly!
So here it is and let me know what you think :
----------------------------------------------------------

If only you knew how your look makes me feel
If only you knew that your voice makes me kneel
If only you knew how much I love you
If only you knew that I trust in you


If only you knew that I can’t live without you,
Would you leave every night just like you always do?
If only you knew that you are my shining bright star
Would you look for me no matter how far?
If you knew that at the end there’s no beginning
Would you close your eyes and start remembering?

If only you knew that every time you cry my soul breaks
Would you smile and look again at the beautiful snowflakes?
If only you knew you are something sublime
Would you leave and say “goodbye”?
If you knew…..would you?

This is what I'm currently listening to:





Laugh...dream....smile...think...learn...fight...be happy....every day counts!

Shadows and lights

Have you ever thought how it would be if your shadow would just vanish?

Laugh...dream....smile...think...learn...fight...be happy....every day counts!

In sadness I dwell

I don't feel okay right now and I decided that for the moment I'm not going to take any pictures....I feel depressed I think, or just a little upset, but I just don't feel like being creative anymore. The camera doesn't call for me anymore. I don't know when I'll post again....
This is one of the photos I wanted to post on Deviantart....for some reason I feel attracted to it...




Laugh...dream....smile...think...learn...fight...be happy....every day counts!

God is a painter!

Today I'll post several photos:)

I love looking at the sky...When I was little I used to watch the sky for hours and hours and just see shapes in the clouds, I still do that now but not as often as I'd like. A couple of years ago I thought to my self that doing this it's really stupid and I was certain that no one my age would do some thing like this until I met HER ---- my best friend, the artist, the poet, the spiritual, the life lover, the one who smiles every moment, the kid, the one who deserves all the best things in the world, the one to whom I'd go to Hell and stay there if that would save her...now enough with the compliments because I wouldn't like her to develop and ego issue because of me:P....This is her blog, check it out!

Today I feel good, don't know why but I do:P....I feel like shouting but since I'm nowhere remote I wouldn't like to give any one a heart attack with my "amazing voice/scream"...Now I have a headache...God, this moods are killing me:P...Anyway I was trying to say something and I'm just about to forget so I'll get right to the subject....
Isn't it nice when you go outside and just see the beauty of things??? When God created Earth he was in a really good mood...I wonder if he ever ran out of inspiration? I love photography and I just hope that someday I'd be as good as the photographers that I admire.....Peace to you all my friends...


Sunburst by ~RowanIris on deviantART


This is my best friend:


Dizzy Hair by ~RowanIris on deviantART

This is something a very talented girl made and you should really check out her galley on Deviant.com - link





Another friend I recently made here is Anna, a fellow blogger and photographer. I promise you that once you visit her blog you'll be amazed by her writing and photography and also by her beautiful son Matthew ---- link


Since we are already talking about babies, I'd like you to visit Nicole Smith's blog. She's a very talented painter. Her paintings are ideal for a gift or why not for your personal use. If you want to brighten up your kid's room then you found the right place.



Laugh...dream....smile...think...learn...fight...be happy....every day counts!

Spitfire

Heart Played by ~RowanIris on deviantART


Laugh...dream....smile...think...learn...fight...be happy....every day counts!

Somewhere in time

There was a time when I jumped in the fire,
And when I wanted to seek and destroy the thing that should not be.
I tried to follow the call of Ktulu but I was trapped under ice.
I came across my own Sanitarium as I became a harvester of sorrow.
Am I evil? I asked myself once....no,there's just a bad seed in me.
The problem that I had with myself in wasn't a blitzkrieg, it was a long cold war.
I tried to hear the low man's lyrics as I was searching for the eye of the beholder
But in my way I didn't find the phantom lord nor prince charming
I didn't find what I was looking for....
I had to escape creeping death by fighting fire with fire
Because I didn't want to become king nothing or helpless.
Sometimes I had the feeling that The God that failed was in my life,
And that the struggle within made my life blackened.
Through the never I seeked the hero of the day
And where the wild things are I found her
As the small hours faded away and Tuesday was gone,
Slowly we began to speak and realize that it wasn't too late too late.
And the more I see I realize that I'm not a damaged case after all
Nothing else matters except the gratitude I have for the hero of the day,
Who thought me that to live is to die but in the same time that I had to carpe diem baby!
She took attitude and made me turn the page.
There was a new beginning waiting outside the door.
She was the one who helped me find my cure,
And who put fuel into my battery in order to move on.
She also brought the four horsemen in my life, to what I'm gratefull for...
I shall always take my five friends with me wherever I may roam.
I used to think that I was bleeding me,
But now I know that I was just killing time.
She is not a disposable hero nor a dyer's eve
She is the master of the puppets and the Orion in my life,
But for me she will always be the HERO OF THE DAY..
I'm not going to dance the devil's dance
I shall move on just like I'm supposed to.
Sad but true this story is true....
The memory remains but I'm not going to get on the frayed ends of sanity because of this.


thank you hero of the day.....smile for me, please

See through

See Through by ~RowanIris on deviantART

Meet the Dancing Cat

The Dancing Cat by ~RowanIris on deviantART

Welcome home

Where times stands still

Welcome to where time stands still
No one leaves and no one will
Moon is full, never seems to change
Just labeled mentally deranged
Dream the same thing every night
I see our freedom in my sight
No locked doors, no windows barred
No things to make my brain seem scarred

Sleep, my friend, and you will see
That dream is my reality
They keep me locked up in this cage
Can't they see it's why my brain says “rage”

Sanitarium, leave me be
Sanitarium, just leave me alone

Build my fear of what's out there
Cannot breathe the open air
Whisper things into my brain
Assuring me that I'm insane
They think our heads are in their hands
But violent use brings violent plans
Keep him tied, it makes him well
He's getting better, can't you tell?


No more can they keep us in
Listen, damn it, we will win
They see it right, they see it well
But they think this saves us from our hell

Sanitarium, leave me be
Sanitarium, just leave me alone
Sanitarium

Just leave me alone

Fear of living on
Natives getting restless now
Mutiny in the air
Got some death to do
Mirror stares back hard
kill is such a friendly word
seems the only way
for reaching out again




Today I feel weird, I haven't slept well....actually I did, but this hasn't happened in a while so I guess it's kinda new:P:P....Anyway there's something that keeps my mind busy and for some reason I feel like listening to Sanitarium again. And no, i'm not PMS-ing:|

Little spider

Now...on another note I have something that I would like to comment on:)

"Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film."

The above quote knocked me off of me chair...My suggestion is that if you ever want to use your photographic memory ever again go to your nearest film dealer and buy a new one, or better yet....try digital, it's worth it:P:P


Have a good night everyone

The happy pepper

I returned from college and I'm more than tired...I kinda stopped enjoying waking up at 6.20 in the morning (if you think that I'm complaining, you're just imagining:P ). Anyway, exams start this week so I wish you good luck to you all who are facing this hazard:P

I hope you like the Happy pepper :)

Rasnov Borough